I don’t know what’s happened this weekend, but it seems that Carole’s out-spoken streak didn’t end with her being mean to vets yesterday.
This morning we chanced our arm at went to see Despicable Me 2 at the cinema. We went to the quarter past eleven showing and so, as you would expect, found ourselves in the presence of children aplenty. Which is not a massive surprise, obviously, because it’s essentially a kid’s movie with enough laughs for the adults as well. Or, to look at it another way, it’s a cartoon for adults with some bits put in to keep the kids happy. Either way it’s going to attract kids in the same way that flies are attracted to shit.
When we got to the cinema, there were already a selection of children hanging from the underside of the stairs while their adult supervision did pretty much nothing about it. Which is a more and more common thing, these days. When I was a child, if I’d started hanging off the underside of some stairs and swinging around my parents would have shouted at me, hit me and taken me home again. Probably. And not necessarily in that order.
But these children were allowed to carry on swinging to their heart’s content. Bless their little cotton socks. After all, if they were to fall and be injured in some way, their adult supervisors could sue the cinema for damages or something. So have it, tiny monkey-like children, you carry on swinging.
Of course, my immediate reaction was “What a collection of shits.”
Which made it all the more fun as they sat immediately behind us in the cinema and proceeded to kick the backs of our seats.
Just before they sit down, as one of the mothers with them started to point out where they should sit Carole, quite loudly, went “Noooooooooooooo!” followed up with a “Seriously?!?”
And as our seats were kicked more than an idiot standing behind a donkey, we had a small debate about whether we should move. It didn’t last very long, as you can imagine. And we moved to the back row of the screen, to a row which contained precisely two seats. And it was glorious.
Until another family of obnoxicons turned up so sit in front of us.
They weren’t too bad, in all honesty. Apart from the “can I sit on your knee? Can I sit on my seat? Can I sit on your knee” fidgiting of the child in front of me it could have been a lot worse.
And then it came to the end, and the Minion bit sin the credits. We were trying to watch them. And enjoying the bits we’d seen. When the family of obnoxicons just stood up. And then didn’t move. They just stood there. Blocking the view.
At which point Carole’s new-found love for speaking out took over once more.
Sometimes I’m ashamed to know her.