I think Peppa must read this blog.
Less than twelve hours after I wrote yesterday’s blog about her waking me up with cold paws, she’s already come up with a new – and, if I’m honest, incredibly unexpected – method of waking us up.
This morning, you see, she got Homer Simpson to do it.
Carole has had a Homer Simpson dashboard thing since I’ve know her. I’ve never know it be on a dashboard, it’s always just sat on a bookshelf in the bedroom and periodically one or the other of us has pressed the little yellow button and enjoyed Homer’s traffic-based insights. “Red light turn green…. now! Now! Now! Now! Woohoo!” etc. But recently, no matter how hard you pressed the button, Homer didn’t speak. His batteries had finally given up the ghost. He was an ex-Homer. We coulld have changed the batteries, if we had access to one of the world’s smallest screwdrivers, but we didn’t and so he resided upon the bookshelf for all intents and purposes dead.
He’s recently moved from the bookshelf during a period of tidying up, when we started to declutter the clutter on the front of the shelves. All the nick-nacks and toys and Lego and Muppet beanie babies and… well, you get the idea. Obviously, as Homer is dead, we figured it might be time to remove him. But with every big decision like that there comes a period of indecision in which an object is moved into another room, or put somewhere for throwing away, for a couple of weeks before the deed can be done.
So Homer was living in the spare bedroom. Temporarily on a chair that Peppa was also using as a bed, despite it having things on it. She is nothing if not persistent, that one – she will not let obstacles stand in her way when it comes to lying on something she has taken a shine to.
It would appear that during her slumberings, Peppa has somehow managed to activate Homer, causing him to utter one of his hilarious phrases about other drivers being idiots or his car turning mysteriously into the car park of Krusty Burger. Which woke us up. And scared the crap out of Peppa as well.
We found Homer on the floor. It’s unclear as to whether Homer was pushed and then spoke, or spoke and then pushed. Either way, Peppa seems to have breathed new life into him. And found a brilliant new way to wake us up in the process – there’s nothing better than the unexpected sound of another person in your house to startle you into consciousness, even if it then turns out that the person in question is only about four inches tall and yellow.
So that probably means we won’t be throwing him away anymore.
Stupid indecision period.